How to be an effective boss with emotional intelligence

We all know how miserable a bad boss can make working at even your dream job. Bad bosses seem to be everywhere. Why is this the case when we know how important a good leader is? A good boss is essential for motivating and supporting employees as well as creating an effective and happy work environment which in turn will create a successful business and fulfilled employees.

Why Bad leadership is the norm

The reason for bad bosses is rather simple lack of training and poor screening processes for potential bosses. Not everyone is made to be a boss. If you have a high temper and low patience you’re probably not the best person to lead a team that requires you to stay calm in even the most stressful situations. Often people climb up the ranks from employees to bosses due to hard work and excelling in their current role. In many cases, this indicates the ability to lead a team. Wrong. Leading requires more than knowing what to do independently, it’s a whole new ball game dealing with human beings who have their own values, thoughts, cultural experiences and emotions working together from 9- 5, 5 days a week. This requires patience, social skills and emotional intelligence. Unfortunately, most of us have not been taught emotional intelligence in the same way we learnt English, Maths and Science and it’s a skill that has been greatly undervalued.

“Leadership is not domination, but the art of persuading people to work toward a common goal.”

― Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence

Daniel Goleman is the author of Emotional intelligence which has been titled a best seller by The New York Times for more than 1 year. According to Goleman, there are 5 key components to emotional intelligence which can certainly be used and developed to become a good leader.

Good decision making

One essential skill needed to be a good leader is good decision-making skills. Daniel Goleman suggests self-awareness allows you to be more in touch with your gut. Sometimes there is information your brain is unable to tell you in words but can be felt through your gut. There are fundamental values we have that inform all the decisions we make that at times we may not think of but it will always be felt and taken into consideration through your gut sense. Being able to trust your gut sense can help you make decisions from beyond the most obvious information but from a more emotionally intelligent perspective.

“The top 10% of performers displayed superior competencies in emotional intelligence, rather than in purely cognitive thinking.”

According to Daniel Goleman’s book Emotional Intelligence, these are the top 5 skills to learn in order to have better emotional intelligence and become a good leader.

• Self-awareness.
• Self-regulation.
• Motivation.
• Empathy.
• Social skills.

“Leaders need an inner focus to be aware of their own feelings, values and intuitions, and to manage themselves well. A focus on others allows a leader to read people well, which is key to managing relationships – the art of leading itself. And an outer focus lets a leader understand the larger forces and systems that she must navigate and to determine the best strategy going forward”.